Nägin silmanurgast oma selja taga üht meesterahvast, kes seisis, käed risti rinnal. Tundsin ennast natuke ebamugavalt, ja meenus muusikatundidest saadud kriitika. Mõtlesin selle peale, et miks muusikakoolidesse on raske sisse saada. Ja miks üldse on raske ennast teinekord loominguliselt väljendada.
Mulle tundus, et raske on ennast üldse kuidagi väljendada, kui kuulaja hoiak on pidevalt kriitiline. Ma pean selle all silmas seda, et pidevalt tuleks justkui elada hirmu all, kas tehtu oli õige või vale. Tahaks vabaneda kuidagi sellest. Ja nüüd harjutangi. Luban endal eksida ja harjutan ka nooti, mida ma ei oska ja lähebki valesti.
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Memories from Sunday, January 24th, 2016
From the corner of my eye I saw a male standing behind me, hands crossed on his chest. I felt a little bit uncomfortable, and I recalled the critics that I had got from the music classes. I thought why is it hard to get into the music schools. And why is it sometimes hard to express yourself creatively at all.
It felt that it is hard to express yourself, when the listener is constantly in a critical/criticizing position. By this I mean that somehow we should live under a constant fear, if the move that we made, was right or wrong. I would like to be free of it. And now I am practicing. I allow myself to err and I also practice notes, that I cannot yet play, and it does go wrong.
Hei! Tee nii nagu joogat - pole õiget ega valet, tähtis on vaid see, et sina teed. Sa teed ju seda ikkagi enese jaoks.
VastaKustutaOtse loomulikult tuleb noodi harjutamine ka kasuks, aga minu arvates ei tohiks keegi eeldada, et sa kohe loomulikust intelligentsist seda oskad.